I got this note from a 54-year old lady, “I have always
preferred younger men. I live with a wonderful
young man (29). He makes me laugh all of the time. He is very protective of me and my 15 year old son. We have so much in common. I love him very much. I worry that someday he will
grow tired of our relationship and want to
move on to a younger woman. He says no way! I just tell him that I will cherish the time that we have together and if the time comes that he wants to
move on, I will
let him go. We just take it one day at a time, and right now, really enjoy each other.”
Not all young men dating cougars leave them for women their age
Her attitude is the right one, though, I told her that she should try to get this thought out of her head that he will get tired of the relationship and leave her. Maybe he will, but so can a man of any age, and that is why I would not like her to hold his younger age against him.
Iskra Williams // Sep 12, 2011 at 12:12 pm
I was in a relationship with a guy 19 years younger than myself! I was 40 and he was 21! The age difference made more of a difference to me than him and after a while it really didn’t matter. But one day three years later he decided he wanted out!! I always knew the day would come but when it did, it knocked me for six!!! I old, empty and heartbroken isn’t the word!! But, then I realised it had nothing to do with my age!! If us women of age make a choice to date younger men/boys, we need to be realistic about the whole game!! Unless the younger man has lived and is responsible about the situation, it can work! If you find that you’re like his mum, always having to remind him what he should be doing, it’s time to take a reality check!! Especially when u have kids yourself!!! No matter what the age is, men are boys at heart and always will be so age for women I’d never the issue!!!!
Jay Dwivedi // Sep 15, 2011 at 3:07 pm
Iskra, thanks for the honest commentary. I always like to say that men leave women all the time, even when they are older or same age. In general, men who choose to date older women do so willingly and their reason to leave them have little to do with the age difference. It is just that we all need to find explanations in life and blaming the age difference is an easy one.