Joy writes, “I find it very difficult to communicate with my boyfriend. He thinks I don’t make him laugh or release tension through my speech. Can you please help me with a better way to communicate with him to make me look more interesting and fun to be with?”
I think you are what you are and you have a certain way to communicate, so I am not sure why is your boyfriend complaining. We all have our personalities and the way we communicate is developed over a long period of time. Therefore, I do not like that he wants you to change. Having said that, we can all make improvements and here are some suggestions for you:
- Less negative talk. In other words, if you do not have a nice thing to say, better be quiet rather than saying something that he will not like. No one likes to hear negative comments.
- Watch funny television programs and try to pay less attention to news about crime and politics. You will soon realize that you now know more entertaining and funny topics.
- If there are any problems or important difficult conversations to be had, do not say them whenever they come to your mind. Instead, write them down and wait for the right time. You can even ask him casually “Hey I have a few things bothering me that I wanted to discuss with you. When is a good time for us to sit down and chat about them?” That way he will be mentally prepared for a serious chat and wouldn’t be irritated to hear something that he was not prepared.
- Find out what he likes to talk about in general and with his friends. For instance, I like to relax making fun of celebrities or politicians or my boss. Now get to know more about those topics and then you can tell him things he may not know and that will surely make him laugh.
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