MYNIPPON

Summary:  Whenever we are part of a group, chances are that we will not like everyone equally.  There are bound to be some less than desirable elements and the best way to deal with them is through ignorance rather than conflict.  Life is too short to try to fix the whole world.

Nicky writes, “I have a friend who just can’t leave me alone. I used to like how she used to copy my hairstyle and put my last name as hers on Facebook but now it’s ANNOYING me. She now puts my WHOLE name as HER name, and I think she got the impression she can control me and tells me I look ugly in certain pants.  All my other GOOD friends think she’s being a normal buddy. And if I’m not friends with that jerk, all my other friends will get mad at ME! I don’t know what to do.  Also I should add that every time I see her she screams or shouts my name SO loud that everyone stops to stare. Before it was plain cute. Now it’s plain weird. It’s not like I don’t see her every 90 days! I see her almost every day! When she’s sick or something and stays at home, I’m guilty of thinking “YES!” or “FINALLY!” It’s wrong because she’s my ‘friend.’ I slapped her in the face once because I couldn’t hide my emotions (I regret SO much doing that) and she starting crying and she said I was a …wrong word and next day, she says that it’ll be even if she slaps ME. And even when I said “NO” she slapped harder than I bet I slapped her! Now I’m angry and confused about what to do.  Should I forget my ‘friends’ and find NEW ones? Or still be with my friends and stay with this difficult person?  This girl is really weird and has a lot of personal issues.”

There are friends and there are acquaintances

Now an easy piece of advice would be to simply dump all your friends and start all over.  Ain’t easy; isn’t it?  So a more realistic approach is to minimize interaction with her and ignore her to the extent possible.  Remember that you did screw up a bit in the beginning by encouraging some of her disgusting behavior because you thought she was funny or cute.

We all have to live with annoying family members, relatives, and when we grow up, with obnoxious colleagues.  You will realize that even if you got a whole new set of friends, there will always be some jerk who will make your life hell.  And the more you get annoyed the more control you have transferred to these people.  So be strong, and do not think that she controls your life or can dictate if you can be happy.  Just pretend she is a small irritant in your life and move on in your life as if she does not exist.