Summary: Below is the case of a woman being abused by her husband during the process of divorce. I provide tips to her best friend to help her out so that she can maintain her sanity before she gets rid of her violent husband for good.
Allison writes, “My best friend is going through a divorce but her husband’s behavior is scaring me. I feel her life and her son’s lives are in danger. It has already been established that he is a control freak, and kills her self esteem every chance he can. He constantly yells at her and calls her stupid and other names in front of friends, family, and especially disturbing, in front of her sons. No one is allowed over to their house – EVER. This week he decided that he was going to join her co-ed soccer group – he was on the other team, when she had control of the ball he ran up behind her and pushed her from behind, violently – she is now in a walking cast with a fractured foot. Then we get 3 feet of snow and he only shovels his half of the driveway. She got someone to clear off her side of the driveway and he is threatening to sue whoever was on his property. It is her house! The separation process has been going on for about a year now – he is constantly stalling and will not put the house up for sale. How does she get rid of this idiot before he loses total control and actually puts her in the hospital or worse? What can I do as a friend?”
Options for women going through divorce
This story is incredible. I cannot believe that there are such human beings in 2010. Do you know if she has an attorney? Why are they still together if they are separated? Why hasn’t she asked him to move out if she owns the house?
My advice will be that if you can get to her on the phone or by email, ask her to seek help of her divorce attorney. I am no legal expert but this kind of behavior sounds like domestic violence to me and the police/courts maybe able to help (she maybe able to get a restraining order against him forcing him out of the house). If you cannot get to her, contact a close family member of hers and ask them to seek legal help for her protection (if money is a problem, as a friend, you can pay for the attorney or pull together a group of friends to donate for her legal defense). Do not get directly involved because this man is clearly dangerous. Who knows if has a lethal weapon and might use it against you or her.