Ramona writes, “I am a woman with a lot of discipline and I have a certain way of doing things. When others do it for me, I tell them how to do it and then keep an eye on them to make sure that it gets done exactly as I told them and precisely how I like it. I realize this that this is very stressful and unproductive for me but I am unable to change. What can I do to just let others do their best and then enjoy my life?”
I have a close family member who likes to be in control all the time and all I can say is that I hate him. For example, when I am driving him around when he visits, not only does he fret if I am going too fast or not, but he will even keep an eye to check if I have enough fuel and if the oil level is right (needless to say that he hates flying because he has to surrender control).
On the other hand, I am the type of person who loves to be driven around, even by a teenager. Even better if I am in the back seat. I can enjoy the view, listen to some trance music on my iPod, or just take a nap. Ramona, there is a reason we have colleagues at work. I am sure that you are good at what you do and some of your colleagues may not be as good (at least in your eyes), but the world works because others do something that you cannot do (like pilot an airplane) or do it better than you do (like professional tailors, in case you do know some stitching). And as a leader, you can only win by delegating as much as you can so that you can focus on what you are really good at rather than monitoring every small detail.