MYNIPPON

Ron is a single man and while hanging out at the beach during his summer break he noticed that a married woman staying at the same resort started to flirt with him.  He says, “She was a gorgeous girl married to a much older man, who is balding, has a pot belly (think couples like Rupert Murdoch-Wendi Deng or Kelsey Grammer-Kayte Walsh), and the whole time he was there, he hardly paid any attention to her, but was glued to his mobile phone.  She just looked unhappy and bored with him.  When she would go take a dip in the water, she even talked to me a few times, we introduced ourselves and shared casual tidbits about our towns and what we did.  Over the course of several days, I made it a point to camp right next to them, and we kind of got to know each other, because she needed someone to talk to her and that unfriendly husband of her didn’t care about her or me or anyone else.  It almost seemed he was dealing with a major crisis of some kind.  Based on what she said, I Googled her and kind of know where she lives.  I think that based on what I have told her, she can also Google me and track me down.  Unfortunately I never got an opportunity to tell her that we should exchange contact information because hitting like that on a married woman seemed so awkward, even though, I would love to date her and convince her to leave that nasty man she is with.  I am reluctant to call her because I do not want her to get into trouble but I wonder why wouldn’t she track me down.  Please help.”

Could she be just using you as a toy on the beach? At his point, we only know that there is some attraction towards you but we do not know if it is serious enough on her part.  Unfortunately, you have not told her that either.  So she might be just playing this game of hide and seek behind her husband.  Maybe she is unhappy in her marriage and this sort of game gives her enough material to enter a world of fantasy of her own: a hot guy she meets on the beach who makes passionate love to her right there under the moonlight and then they live happily thereafter.

Women typically do not make the first move: I think as a woman I do not expect her to hunt you down.  She might think that you maybe married or not that interested in her or you would get spooked out (exactly the kind of fears that you have).  Plus, she might be afraid that you might think that she is a cheap woman.  You know how the women are in general about their reputation and in approaching men, especially if they are married.  Maybe she is not so savvy on the Internet to track you down.  Maybe she expects a man to make the first move.  And maybe the hubby beat her up for hitting on some hot dude on the beach.

If you genuinely want a girl, you have to chase her: Ron, why she would not take the first step, well, maybe I am correct in my hypothesis, but who knows what is going on in her head.  My recommendation would be to follow this through, track her down, keep an eye on her movements, and then catch her outside her home for a few minutes in the supermarket or a gas station.  Maybe you don’t have to say a thing to her, but just hand her a letter.  I think if you do that discreetly, she is unlikely to call the cops on you.  Maybe you will need to take some time off from work, camp out in a hotel close by, and then drive around her property to get a sense of her schedule.  Hopefully, that will result in a much better outcome than you thinking about it hoping for a call from her.  At least this way if you do not hear from her, you would not need to wait forever.