Fear of rejection among women
How to deal with rejection by men in a relationship?

By Imfwama Wotela  

Rejection and loneliness are two negative aspects of life that we all fear to ever have to go through. They exist and are a part of life that we will encounter along the journey of life either directly or indirectly. Something that exists, needs to be dealt with, and not ignored. The negative aspects of life are what shape our character and make us wise. How we deal with these negatives is very vital. If we will choose to stay on the negative and not use them as stepping stones, then I am afraid we are doomed. Rejection is an aspect of refusing or rejecting what you feel you don’t want or don’t wish to get involved in any more. Sometimes you give reasons and at times you don’t. The reason being that you fear to hurt the other person but you must just do it anyway. Men sometimes handle rejection better than women. I suppose it’s because they are hunters. To them, there are more “preys” out there so they keep going. On the other hand, women battle with it. When a woman is rejected, the first thing she wants to know is why? Then when she can’t get the answer she starts to assume that there must be something wrong with her. Her mind may suggest that she is fat, has a big nose, her hair is too short, her skin color is bad, she is ugly, and wished she looked like Paris Hilton, etc. I call this the silent destroyer. Then she starts to blame herself, eventually hate herself, and finally accepts defeat. After a while the ‘wise’ solution comes along: how do I change and make myself perfect to be good enough for him so that he comes back (not so wise, huh?).  After this, there is low self-esteem and in the mind a lot of negative thoughts continue to breed. Girl, it’s not necessary! Why must you torture yourself like this? A word of wisdom: When someone does not want you, never force yourself on him or her. Respect their decision and move on. Don’t let it harbor in your heart in anger or try to get to hurt them or keep fighting to have them. Hey, sometimes some things are just never meant to be and at times it’s a blessing in disguise. Related article:  How to deal with loneliness after rejection?