Stop being lonely
How to take control of your life and build your self worth?

By Imfwama Wotela

No man is an island; we all need to be loved, and by Nature’s design, we are not meant to be alone. However, you can be lonely even among your family and friends because you allow yourself to sink into your own world and build a wall around yourself or choose to live in a shell. 

You can also get lonely when you lose a loved one to death, divorce, or rejected by someone you want so badly. Sometimes we are afraid to be who we really are and we compromise or live in deceit so that we are accepted or liked by others. All this is due to the fear of ending up alone. In life, it’s wise that at one point you walk certain steps of your life alone in order to develop total freedom or independence, wisdom, and character.  In loneliness, I have noticed that usually two strong characteristics can come out depending on your attitude towards life and the way you perceive life to be.

• If you are not careful, you will hate yourself, thereby hate others, become very selfish, and think everybody hates you and there is something wrong with the world and not you, and yet you still wonder why no one tries to make friends with you anymore. Others are even proud that people fear to approach them. Time flies and soon people will give up on you and move on. Then it will be too late. So loneliness can be as a result of your attitude of selfishness. Such people end up dying out of bitterness all alone or even commit suicide. Sad!
• The other aspect that can come out is that of a wise person who will be willing to try again, takes risk, and reach out their hand to give again. They will start to think and to reason in their mind especially when they fall ill and are in hospital with no one to visit them at Christmas and on birthdays. Upon realizing what they are missing out on, they will reach out. 

Negative aspects come but we ought to fight them and come out. Don’t entertain them nor stay with them.

I have good news for you. Rejection and loneliness are negative aspects and to every negative there is a positive aspect. We should never in our lives allow negative aspects to determine what choice we make for our lives because so many times they are wrong ones. Just like I believe a hasty decision or a decision made in anger will always breed disaster.

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