I got a call early in the morning at 6 AM. It was my cousin. She had been beaten badly by her husband the previous night. She was on her way to her parent’s house and wanted to meet me first before proceeding. Half an hour later I was listening to the whole ordeal. She is a strong woman at 25 with two little boys aged 4 years and 10 months and still very attractive. Her right eye and cheek was swollen and the bottom lip had a deep cut. She shed no tears as she narrated the story.
Her crime:
- She came late from choir practice – 6.30 PM
- Was dropped off by the pastor (a male)
- She was smiling as she walked into the house and seemed very happy with herself.
The lady’s husband was convinced that his
wife was having an affair with the pastor. Apparently, he had given a ride to three other people and she was the last person to be dropped off. He has always had problems with his
wife’s looks and feared someone might take her away from him.
This is one out of even more serious stories of wife battering and the reasons are usually things that can easily be discussed and resolved amicably by both partners. The woman in this situation was a victim of jealousy and insecurity. This is what we will discuss here.
Man is one very complex creature to fully understand. He is not perfect but can be taught to be what you want him to be. He is shaped by the things he goes through in life, what he sees, thinks and by his surrounding. If not shaped well, instead of giving life he will kill; instead of being loving, he will be hateful; instead of being kind, he will be wicked; instead of being reasonable, he will be unreasonable; etc. But mostly it all depends on him because he is not a robot but the only creature given power of self will or power to choose.
Jealousy! What is it?
I define it this way. Jealousy is a deadly contagious poison that stains your heart and causes your mind to plot evil. It gets hold of you when you find something you wish you had but can’t have or discover that you will never be like another person. It causes you to have anger and bitterness against those that you think have it all. It causes you to think negative or imagine things that are not actually there. It blinds you and you develop wrong judgment. It keeps your mind so occupied plotting negatives. You become a slave, very unhappy and want others to be unhappy too. You start to have strange imaginations that are not true.
Related articles: Insecurity
is the sister of jealousy and How
to eliminate jealousy?
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