How to get a friend with benefits?
Benedict Carey of the New York Times has a great article on the topic of “friends with benefits.” While these relationships are fairly common among people of all ages, this is the first time we have scientific data on them. According to this article, “…most college students report having had at least one such relationship…One-tenth of these relationships went on to become full-scale romances…About a third stopped the sex and remained friends, and one in four eventually broke it off — the sex and the friendship. The rest continued as friends-with-benefits relationships.”
So if you are in one of these uncommitted relationships, you need to think hard about how you will control your emotions and how you will respond if the other partner changes her/his emotions. Paul Mongeau, a professor of communications at Arizona State University, is quoted as saying “One of the most interesting things I get from it is this sense that people in these relationships are afraid to develop feelings for the other person, because those feelings might be unreciprocated.â€
So what is the best way to have a FWB?
Lock your emotions in a locker and pick a person who can do the same. If you are putting a personal ad (try this free dating website), make it very clear upfront.
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