What to do if a much younger man wants to date me?
Heather, a woman in her forties, writes, “Lately, a younger man (in his 20s) has been inviting me out. He contacts me on the phone or vial e-mail. I don’t know what to do because, yes, I am terribly attracted to him and we share a lot of common interests, but, I used to be his teacher a few years ago. He’s already a college student and I am no longer his teacher. I realize I am not Demi Moore nor he Ashton Kutcher, but I don’t know, I feel weird. I feel we understand each other quite well but at the same time I feel we shouldn’t. We just go out, we share moments, interests and talk a lot. Not even kissing has happened yet. There’s a vibe; he looks for me. What should I do? I am so confused.”
I think legally you are clear – you are both adults now and you are no longer his teacher.
Yes, it is a delicate situation since the age difference is huge, but these days it does not seem to matter to both men and women. Recently I helped a woman exactly in your situation who was dating her son’s best friend. And both were getting along fine and even the son and the boyfriend were able to be good friends.
With such huge age difference, I typically see that they don’t have a huge long-term potential. When it comes to marriage, people still end up marrying someone in their age bracket 99% of the time.
If you are not looking for anything serious at this time, I would encourage you to try it. Go with an open mind and see what happens. You could very well become a member of that 1% exclusive group and may end up feeling like Demi Moore.
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