Will my younger boyfriend leave me for a young woman?
Francine writes, “I am a 26 year old single mum to a 4 year old boy, divorced and dating a man aged 20. I worry that he may leave me eventually for a younger woman because he doesn’t have that much experience in dating. I love him fiercely and I believe he does too. His family is totally against me and I don’t blame them. I don’t feel the age gap between us and neither does he, but he is incredibly jealous to a point where he becomes violent. I just want to know whether I’m wasting my time believing that he would never cheat on me and if I should move on?”
You are in a difficult situation because you are dating someone who is, as you said, still immature and very likely to take a rash decision on the basis of advice from parents and/or friends who are his age too.
Having said that, I am hearing from lots of couples in your situations who are doing just fine and have managed to fight social pressure to breakup.
The question is Do you really want to be this man forever. I definitely do not like the jealousy part and even less the violence. While you are crazily in love right now, it might even feel good that he is so protective and jealous, but trust me, men like him can be dangerous, obnoxious, and very difficult. Also his family is totally opposed to the whole thing and will make your life difficult.
My position is that no woman should waste her time if her younger partner will cheat with a younger woman because that can happen even when the man is her age. There is no evidence that younger boyfriends are more likely to cheat.
I am not necessarily suggesting that you end the relationship right away but I would recommend that you be vigilant over the coming months and see how it evolves. That will enable you to keep it all in perspective and you can decide later what you want to do.
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