Relationship with my older boyfriend is not working out
Samantha tells me (if you need help, please write to me), “I am currently 21 and my boyfriend is 39. The first few months were great but then it started going down hill. He wanted a more mature woman who would play out his fantasies but that is just not for me and we resolved that issue but it seems there is always one obstacle after the next to overcome. What advice do you have for me?”
What you are going through is somewhat common among couples with huge age gaps simply because they are at two different points in their lives. You are a young woman while this man will be entering his middle age any time now. When a couple is strongly attached to each other, they learn to deal with these differences by appreciating that they are at two different stages and need to respect that. It appears that he is struggling to respect those differences.
Having said that, the problems that you two have been having may also have nothing to do with his being older. There is a possibility that you two are just not compatible and would have the same problems even if he were same age as you are.
You have some thinking to do if you want to work on those problems or if it is better to end this relationship now. Considering your age, it will be much easier for you to find another man who is more compatible to you. That is why you are the one who will need to make that decision since he may not want to breakup with you (it is not easy to find a woman at his age).
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