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Attracting a woman by being "pre-approved"

By Pierre Coda

  Recently I helped Brian from New York City as part of our romance advice feature. He wrote to us, "Some seduction masters (How to seduce women?) suggest you can attract women by "pre-approving" yourself with, as one guy puts it, "an all-important lipstick kiss on the cheek" (among other ways).  In other words, if you walk into a bar with a not-so-visible lipstick mark on your face, women will be intrigued, think you've "got something" and want to sample it themselves. Of course, I put the question to this fellow who suggested this technique that if a guy can't get dates or attention from a woman, who's going to plant the lipstick print on his cheek in the first place? It was suggested that a platonic lady friend or relative could do the deed. What do you think! This works. I inadvertently walked into a club sporting a kiss mark and I did get attention, and some action that night, but is it practical for most guys in attracting beautiful women?"  (Related article:  Chick magnet)

Photo of a naughty guy sticking his tongue out at his girlfriendI think Brian has an interesting approach. I think what he is talking about is convincing a woman that you have already been accepted by another woman (it is the reason why a divorced man has a slightly easier time with women, even if he is old and has kids, than a single man who has never married, particularly if he has passed a certain age). Women argue that someone who has been married before was accepted by another woman and so she can trust him too. It is one way for a woman to evaluate a man and take the risk of making the next move. She could be totally wrong, but that is the way it seems to work.

Women seek some assurance that a man is worth their time and effort. Remember that even when women are basically looking for a casual date or or a one-night stand, they are still evaluating him as a potential "husband" using the same criteria that they would use when the time to marry has come. The intention to marry may not be there but she intuitively evaluates him using the same standards. That is why handsome, fit, charming, funny, and stable (those with good personalities, jobs, and moral standards) score high with women.

Now putting a lipstick mark is a bit outrageous in my mind, difficult to pull off (e.g. if you are going to a bar after work or if a platonic lady who will do this is difficult to find), and might even come across as a bit tacky, but you can try other simple tricks that are elegant and equally effective and many of my clients have successfully used them. Here are a few tips to attract beautiful women:

  • Ask a friend to call you (could even be a man, but should be willing to play the game for your benefit). A conversation about planning for an 'event' is a good reason for the call. All you need to do is to talk that you will be there on a certain date, time, and that you will be bringing a bottle of wine (Which wine should I buy?). Apologize to your companion(s) after the call for the intrusion but do not offer any explanation about the caller or the event. Keep it mysterious. She is likely to guess the worst: a competitor to her who is already inviting you to a romantic meal. 

  • Always carry a small electronic organizer, and have something marked against each date, even if you have nothing to do. When making an appointment with a target woman or in a group, throw hints about your busy schedule and several appointments that give hints about romantic dates but you don't have to say that directly. For example, your could say that you are going wine tasting, or you will be picking apples, or you have been invited to attend an exhibition at a local museum, etc. These are events that indicate that you are likely to have female company but you could be perfectly single. Keeping the other person guessing is the key here.  (Related article:  50 first date ideas)

  • The #1 complaint that women have with men (and that is why metrosexuals are so hot these days ) is that they think men are not interested in the same things as women are. So another way for you to get 'pre-approved' and to attract a woman is to show your interest in things that interest them and be prepared to offer insights into these issues. Read the same stuff that they read prior to hanging out with women even at a social event. It will tell you what women are talking about these days. Also chat up with a sister or a cousin or a good friend about major issues that women are interested in these days, pick some new information on the subject, and then try to join the conversation. You don't have to deliver a lecture on the subject but you will now be armed with the background information to ask some good questions. That is more than enough to demonstrate to women that you are one of them (and that is when they go into the ladies room and shout "Oh Brian is so cute!). This is what woman find truly attractive in a man: a guy who is a guy but also someone like them.

Recommended Links: Characteristics of seducers    Self confident men attract women    How to attract women?    Find a dream girl

How to attract single women?       Hypnotic seduction      Women who allow men to have mistresses and casual relationships

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