|
Marriage
to an Indian man
The
trend is picking up but still very few Americans are married to
them
By Pierre
Coda
Marriage
to an Indian man by an American woman is a relatively new
phenomenon. While Indian men have been in the US for
decades now, they have traditionally gone back to India to
find brides. However, as India opens up its borders
and American women discover India, there is a rise in
marriage among Americans and Indians. However, as one
would expect, despite the excellent English language
capabilities of Indians, communication is not always easy.
|
|
|
Let us
look at Veronica's case. She is an executive at a software
firm in the San Jose area. She writes, "I met an Indian man two years ago while I was managing a project in
Pune, India, and last year - we were married in New York City! There certainly has been some challenges and still are (in any marriage I'm sure). I'm still learning about how my Indian husband thinks! Misunderstandings are still the biggest problem. He is almost fluent in English, I have very basic skills in the Indian language (Marathi) that he grew up speaking. I think we can communicate really well because he does business in English but emotions are hard to express sometimes without the American context that he lacks and the minimal understanding that I have of his culture. It's very important to express what you feel clearly! What can I do?”
(Related article: Tips
for American women in Asia to find a relationship) |
 Yes
we recognize that you belong to a very small group of women
(that now includes Elizabeth Hurley who is married to Arun Nayar) but we are trying our best to still find such women so that their experiences can be used to improve the lives of all such interracial couples. It is only recently that there has been a surge in number of Americans marrying Indians (from India). Most of it is largely driven by the fact that American companies are increasingly doing business in India and as American executives not only travel to India more often, they also spend months there. So it is natural that relationships will develop and marriages will happen.
(Related:
Indian boyfriend)
From our research, Indian men not only tend to be shy they also do not share how they really feel. They feel that sharing their innermost feelings with a woman will make them come across as weak and feminine. And if context is a barrier, things can get very difficult.
So stay positive. Make sure that his “American” English improves and he gets exposed to American culture, which you can do by mixing with as many couples as possible. Once he realizes how different other couples are, he will like to follow them.
You might also want to try to develop a better understanding of Indian culture. Reading books is always a great way to get started. While we are not sure if you can stand
Bollywood films but many of them are actually quite entertaining and
Netflix carries a large selection of them with English subtitles. Most cable companies also carry major Indian TV channels
(e.g. Asia TV, Zee Television, etc.) though they do not always have subtitles.
But it would be an excellent opportunity for both of you to watch
some Indian TV programs and then let him explain those to you.
You can do the same with some American programs.
Finally, talk to him. Ask him questions and tell him about how you think and feel. We expect that he will get
"Americanized" pretty quickly. Just take a look at
Samrat Chakrabarti.
Related links: Indian
festival Holi Indian
foods Indian
woman meets an American man
Japanese couple have an Indian date
Dating
tips for Hindus Challenges
of interracial dating Interracial
marriages
Holi celebrations
Indian girl seeks
American man Find
common ground to make a relationship work
Interracial
romance How
to make interracial relationships work?
Interracial
couples and their challenges Can
interracial relationships work? Manage
expectations in inter-racial relationships
Loving
relationship of an interracial (American-Korean) couple
Latinas
relationships
Latina
girlfriend
Indian woman in lengha
Jessica Alba Mike Myers Love Guru dance
Snoop Dogg in Singh is Kinng movie |
