How to be a perfect mom
It’s never been any secret that I have strong opinions about certain situations. And to add to that, I’m typically very passionate and emotional about what I feel.
Since becoming a Mom, I find that my opinions have quadrupled what they used to be. Who hasn’t? Commercials that the everyday person watches have made me cry, I can’t stand news reports of things happening to children, and I’m aware of what other parents are doing.
At grocery stores, I’m still annoyed to be hearing parents yell at their children. Find another solution because the humiliation of you yelling at them isn’t really going to help the melt down their having.
When dining out, take your screaming child outside to get her to calm down. Quit shoving crap in front of them hoping that SOMETHING makes them quiet. Take them out and give them a minute. When all is calm, come back inside. Worst case: take your food to go!
There have been many times when I’ve been aware of how my child’s behavior is affecting other people. And I don’t want to be that Mom with that child that people are walking past giving looks at. You know how you are, we all do it. Even as a Mom, I do it to other Moms.
But there are situations with Mothers that drive me the most insane. To my anger breaking point:
The Mom that knows everything.
Suddenly after that last push and your baby arrives in this world, you know everything. You used to work but now you quit to be home with your baby. Great! But that doesn’t mean that you instantly know everything and have to become a super hero of the community.
Recently I reconnected with a friend on MySpace from Jr. High. It was great to talk to her. And then she had her son and I’m absolutely annoyed by her bulletins on MySpace:
Community Service Project
Thursday’s Playgroup
New Playgroup MySpace Page
Sale at Walgreens
Get Your Flu Shots
Recipe Exchange
Excuse me? Some of us have not forgotten that girl that turned her head at the table in the lunch room, blew air out of her mouth as hard as she could so that she’d spit the food out of her braces. The queen of no tact has suddenly become super Mom with a 6 month old.
The Mom that doesn’t change, even a little bit.
Somewhere inside each of us there is a need to be funny, witty, comical, and sometimes we make fun of other people. It’s natural, even if you don’t admit it. But make sure that this comical and belittling behavior isn’t directed at your child.
I’m sick of hearing people call their children names or comments about their worth, integrity, or intelligence. And for the love of it, quit using swear words in sentences that directly make comments about your children.
From day one, your baby is watching. Remember that the day is going to come when she’s going to repeat what you’re saying. How will you explain then that making fun of someone isn’t appropriate when they’ve watched you do it all of their life?
You think “I’m the adult” is going to make them understand why it’s not appropriate? Does it make you understand? No, it doesn’t.
One issue of my Baby Center newsletter reminded me that Zadey should be learning 8 to 10 new words per day. I even made a post about this once on. When I read that, I remembered that I should probably stop having my swear words fly.
I’m the queen of swear words. I appreciate how they communicate my emotion. But I would much rather not have my 2 year old scream words not appropriate for her and it’s not for me. I don’t want to teach her that this is the right way to communicate because even though I do it, I don’t think that it is.
Over the past few months I’ve tried to tone down my mouth. I still find myself swearing especially when I’m in high emotion situations. I wish I didn’t do it but to be honest, I have to start paying more attention to myself.
Funny thing is, I’m totally offended to hear others doing it and I’m completely aware that I may be offending someone else when it comes to my attention that I’ve just repeated the F word 5 times in 1 minute.
I’m not saying I’m the perfect Mother.
Those words simply do not dictate how I am as a Mom. And while I’m aware of what other people are doing, I’m aware of my own actions.
Just breathe.
You’re a Mom now, not super hero. Think about how your words are going to affect your baby and she grows, puts them into action, and repeats them.
And for God sakes, wait until they’re at least a year old to think you’ve become the Goddess of your community in performing services.
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