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Second
date with a man of my dreams
Story
of a woman's quest to find a good man after she is over 30
By Nancy
Ryder
Love is a feeling that is so strong that everything else seems so small and dispensable once you experience
real
love. Don and I were getting very close to experiencing it. Even before we met for the second time, I felt that he knew what I sometimes did not even say to him. He could read between the lines, he could read my thoughts, and he could get to the pit of emotions inside my heart that had a tight seal. I have a tendency not to let others see my true self, hear my innermost thoughts, and feel my passions. While I was trying my best, and even more so because of the pressure from Don, who wanted to get to the bottom of the pit in my heart, I was still not doing a great job. Tony, another man that I would date years later, verbalized it more effectively to me what Don told me in rather different words, “I feel I can stretch up my hands to reach the sky. There is something mystic that enables me to reach you. Anyway, I want to find a space near you.” No physical boundaries or laws of the world can separate two lovers. Is it important that two lovers be able to physically meet each other? No, absolutely not!
Love is something that resides in our
souls. Thus, while I missed not being able to look into Don’s eyes every time he said something, I still could just feel him all the time, as if he was a part of me.
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I know that I can say such things since I am such a
spiritual
person, though I am neither religious by any means nor am I saying that I am unique. While many men think of women as just objects to play with that will submit to every desire of theirs, we all do have a soul that is beautiful and pure.
Winter was in full gear still.
Snow continued to fall and I continued to dream of white sandy beaches with my feet touching the warm water. I started to buy more flowers and my mother noticed it. Without mentioning anything, she knew what I needed. She brought even more
flowers for
me, sometimes almost every night. My room was like a garden. My mother’s friends started to show up in my room without any invitation from me to teach me flower arrangement. In fact, I started to enjoy it and I would try new arrangements every day.
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 It was Don’s birthday. January 11th. We had never talked about his birthday before so I was taken aback when he mentioned it to me the night before. He wanted me to be his
only guest. As I heard him say that, I felt so weak, that I immediately sat down on the couch. I was not ready to see him again.
It would be our second
date, if that is what I could call
it. I had met him only once before and it was not a date
in the traditional sense of the term but that was the outcome
any way. It was a rather strange combination of feelings. While I badly missed him and enjoyed every moment I talked to him, it was also a comforting feeling that I was not with him. He was a part of me but not in the sense that I had to be the object of his attention as I moved around. When I hung up the phone, Don was this imaginary creature that was always with me but I still could be myself.
I could not say no. After all it was his birthday and I was the only one invited. I could
barely sleep that night. I tried to picture every moment of my time with him on Saturday. I tossed and turned as I struggled with the usual girlish decisions about
what to
wear, what perfume to use, and
what gift to
buy. I even wondered what the day would look like for the two of us. What shall we do? He had not shared any plans with me except that I was invited.
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I wanted to spend as much time as I could with Don
on our second date and so I decided leave early, which means that I could be with him as early as 9 AM, to which Don readily agreed. How could I miss even a moment of the time that I could possibly have with him?
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