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Relationships
with Japanese women
It
always doesn't work out great
By Jim Cheng
Imagine how bad I must have been feeling to type on a search engine "heartless Japanese
women." Imagine my surprise when I found out that I am not the only one that suffered from an experience with a Japanese girl.
(Related article: Relationship
with a two-timing Japanese woman)
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I went to Japan about 3 years ago for a year, on a scholarship. I had a VERY hard time during the first 3 months. I met Noriko during that time. My Japanese was very poor and so were her English and Spanish. I met her at a nightclub with a dictionary in my hand. We went out a couple of times and mainly because of my "having-a-hard-time-adapting" situation, I started to think about her a lot. University closed for summer break and I had to leave Japan. I took my backpack and my Japanese books. I traveled for 3 months by myself and I studied a lot of Japanese. Those 3 months passed really fast. I barely noticed I was alone and I couldn't wait to go back
"home." (Related article: Experiences
with Japanese women)
Well, as soon as I was back in Japan, and I immediately called her. To my shock, she wasn't really interested. I was in love now but she was not quite interested. She said she was very busy and had other similar lame excuses. Well, the point is that I was thinking about her a lot but she was not there for me. During this tough period, I met another girl. She helped me stop thinking so much about her.
(Related: (Related:
African American women and Japanese men) |
Two months passed and suddenly, for my birthday, Noriko came all the way (a 2 hour drive) to give me a present. She lit the fire again. I couldn't quit thinking about her again.
One day, I called her and invited her to go on a trip to Korea. We spent 15 wonderful days. When we returned to Japan, I noticed a change in her attitude. She was not busy anymore. She even told me she loved me
(Japanese rarely say that, I am
told). So, we spent the next 4 months with so much passion. We had so much fun. It
was simply great. So, after one year, I finally had to go back home. I have never ever cried so much in my life. In fact I had never cried in 20 years. Saying goodbye was so tough.
Readapting to my own country was even harder than adapting to Japan. I had a girlfriend here waiting for me. My mind and heart, however, was still in Japan. I was always thinking about Noriko. I'm sure she suspected something about me being in love with another girl. She never said a thing, and I never told her the truth. During that time, I could not even feel like
kissing her. Of course, we
broke
up, though it took me one year to do it.
Meanwhile, I was working on a trip to the U.S to meet Noriko. We met in Miami and spent another wonderful month together. Another last-night came. We cried again. Hugs were endless. She said in tears that all year she tried to find someone else but that I was the only man that makes her feel important. She said she would marry me and I said I would too. She also cried that she had a terrible year without me.
Well, she said a lot of things, all of which would make any man go nuts. This was in January 2002. Again saying goodbye was terrible but we already had some experience this time and we tried to take a mature approach.
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