Louis
writes, "I've been
married for 2 years now. I'm currently
deployed and there's this girl in my unit and so is
her husband. Her husband is not
deployed with us right now. We've
been friends before she
got
married. That would be about 2 years. She's been
married for about a year or so. She and my wife have
met before at a unit get together but that was the only
time. I also had some
romantic
feelings towards her and we used to
converse,
and sometimes
flirt, with each other but all of this was mild and
just for laughs. Lately she's been sending me what I
think are mixed signals. She makes
eye contact with me and I usually say hi or
acknowledge her when she does that. We recently
worked on a project together and the whole time we were
conversing about minor things like small talk and then
making eye contact with each other during quick glances.
Then every time I would leave early she would give me a
mildly angry look of disappointment. Once as I was
leaving to go back to my room to
sleep
she made the strangest comment to me. She said
sarcastically, "I'm sorry to have wasted your time." Or
something to that
effect. So then I turned around and waited for her to
finish what she was working on. The look she had given
me quickly changed to a happy one. She then continued
with eye contact thing every so often. Another time we
were at a unit get-together and she decided to leave
early. As she said bye to everybody, she was only making
eye contact with me and had a serious look on her face
then walked off. I thought about that for a second and
decided to follow my gut and walk her back to her room.
She and I caught up and started walking slowly together
just making small talk. She was again all of a sudden
happy with me.
There was another weird time where we needed to work on
something together and we coordinated a time and place
to meet up then I jokingly said ok it's a
date and she responded with the same thing. When I
got there she was in nice
casual wear and looked like she had just gotten out
of the
shower because her hair was still wet and she looked
so fresh. She then said that she was glad to see that I
didn't stand her up. I replied by telling her that I
could never do that to her. She then said "good" as she
locked eyes with me and smirked. Eventually she
accidentally marked my leg with a pen and apologized as
she rubbed off the ink. Then I accidently put my hand on
her knee and quickly moved my hand as I apologized. She
didn't say a word about it. When we had finished with
our work she was going to head back to her room to
sleep but quickly changed my mind when I told her I
was gonna
watch a DVD. After that she put our things aside and
started to get comfortable. When the movie started and
the
lead actress appeared she made a comment about how
pretty she was. I didn't agree and she immediately
started asking me about
what kind of girls I like. She was very persistent
about the question as I gave her general answers. Then
she stopped and said goodnight.
I once had to ask her something and so I stopped by her
room and knocked on the door. She was asleep but came to
the door in
her
underwear. She hid behind the door at first but when
she realized that nobody else was around she just
stepped out from behind the door. I blushed and kept my
eyes locked on her so that she wouldn't think I was a
pervert or something. I tried to show her respect.
Now every time she sees me in that room we worked in she
stops and sits next to me and starts to make small talk
for a little while until a
girl friend comes by and starts talking to her. Then
she leaves with that friend without saying a word.
Recently she got sick and came to me asking if I had any
extra cold meds or advice to help her get better. I had
just run out so the next morning I went and bought her
some and dropped it off at her office. She was very
grateful.
Last night at our
friend's
birthday get together she kept making eye contact
with me and smiling as if to say hi or something. Then I
gravitated towards her and sat down. Some of our other
friends were sitting around her and we started
singing some songs together. I left early because I
started to get bored and decided to
watch a movie in that room again. Not long after the
movie started she came in and sat with me for a
while asking me how come I didn't go to my room and
sleep
like I usually do at that time of night. I told her I
couldn't
sleep. She went to change into something more
comfortable and came back to watch a little bit of the
movie with me. We started talking about the
party and eventually she started to get
sleepy so she left for the night.
Now we keep making those passing glances at each other
every time we see each other around or as we happen to
be in the same places. We don't talk as much as we used
to but she still tries to talk to me when we're not
around our
mutual friends. I've just been asking her about her
cold and she likes it I guess because she blushes
sometimes.
I'm just really confused about all of this. I have
feelings
for her again and I'm willing to have a
fling while I'm here but I'm not sure what all of
this means. Please help me to understand so that if I
have a chance I can pursue it. I think about her a lot
but I'm scared to tell her how I feel because I don't
want things to get weird."
What can you do to seduce your
co-worker?
- What will the other person think
of me if I
make an advance?
- Would she/he think that I am a
bad person because I am
ready
to cheat?
- How can she/he assume that I will
cheat on
her/him?
- What if this leaks out?
- What will my husband/wife think
of this?
- Should I do this? Will I make a
fool of myself if I have completely misread the
whole thing?
Considering that you are deployed and
your families know each other, it is very delicate and
risky. If you were on a
business
trip
attending a conference, I would say that just go
ahead and
seduce her, but remember that three of you are in
the same unit and it will be nearly impossible to
keep it a secret, jeopardizing not only your
friendships,
marriages, but probably some disciplinary action
from your unit (though it does not appear that you are
her supervisor).
Based on what you have described, she is definitely
interested in you more than as a colleague.
Seducing
her will be easy. All you need is a quiet spot and
opening your heart to her. If you think that that you
are not in any danger, then go ahead and give it a shot.
Related:
I love my boss
How to hit
on a married woman?
How to
move on after a fling?
Friend to boyfriend
Is it OK to cheat
I am obsessed with a married man
My experience of dating a married man
When will I see results of making advances on a married
woman
How to leave my married boyfriend
Women who
tease men
How to pursue an extramarital relationship
Should I date my boss
How
to hit on my boss
I have a crush on a younger colleague
How to seduce a man on a business trip
How to move on after breaking up at with a colleague |
