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My experiences with a Japanese wife

Not what you would expect from a Japanese woman

I lived in Japan for 10 years and got married to a Japanese woman seven years my senior after being there for about six year. The circumstances that lead to the marriage were symptomatic of why I was never able to have "fun" in the country the way most gaijins do. I am too shy, lack self-confidence, work in a business that people find boring (financial research), have a habit of saying the wrong things at the wrong time, and unable to read others body language (Asperger's Syndrome), the quintessential 'nerd' with thick glasses, have a background of limited involvement with people, for example no parties in high school or university etc., and always had too limited funds to go to the "right" places.
Photo of a couple holding hands at the beach,The bottom line is that there are men in this world whom women find naturally unattractive and whose personality, physical and psychological limitations combine to guarantee failure in any attempt at a relationship. It's a pain to see articles along the lines of "You know you're a loser if..." and every one of the attributes matches you perfectly. That's me.

I got married because I was desperate and so was she. From an physical intimacy point of view, I definitely married the wrong person as whatever little we had stopped as soon as my wife was pregnant with our first child and resumed only to make the second one. Once that was done it was games over and has remained a sexless marriage in the subsequent 13 years.  (Related:  How to find a Japanese woman)

So while some of my friends in Japan were dating truly exciting women, I did not have even one woman - even my wife has been a disaster. I've, however, moved on. We now have two bright kids who are the exact opposite of what I was. I live and work for them. Many guys go to Japan with high expectations after hearing how easy it is to get a Japanese girlfriend. Hell, even I know guys that had a date set up before the Skytrain arrived at Ueno.   There are just no guarantees.

Related:  Sex with Japanese women      30 day sex challenge     How to meet a Japanese girl    Facts about Japanese girls

How to persuade a Japanese girl    Marriage of convenience     Marriage without sex    Date married Japanese women

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