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Nikki
writes, "I'm
seeing a
guy who is 19 years younger than me. We were very
open from the beginning about the fact that
I am married and what we wanted from each other was
a
no strings attached affair. I am unsure as to how
much contact you can have with a person who you are
having an
extramarital affair with (currently about once a
week) without overstepping the boundaries. This is
uncharted territory for me and I could really use advice
as to how I handle this situation."
Do what you must to avoid raising
suspicion
As you probably realize that you are playing with fire.
Therefore, the #1 rule will be to keep the contact at a
level that no one (particularly your hubby and immediate
family members) will be suspicious. Depending on the
situation, it can be once a week or even more but you
will have to always
have a solid alibi. It is also
important that if you think that you can increase the
frequency, then do it gradually. For example, if your
lover is your
personal trainer and you
go
to the gym once a week but suddenly you start going
daily, that maybe a problem, but if you do it twice a
week and then switch to every other day, you have a
better excuse. I guess you get the idea.
Never fall in love when you are
having an NSA affair
The second point is to remember that since you both want
an NSA,
you want to be at a level that you either of you
wouldn't
fall in love. Remember that
proximity breeds love; so if you
spend more
time, you will
develop
stronger feelings for each other.
Make a lover want you even if you
need him even more
And finally, like in
relationship with any man, you want to keep him
waiting and begging. If you are there every time he asks
you, chances are that he wouldn't
desire you as much, but if you keep him just a
little bit hungry, he will be there when you need him. |
