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Can you ask a man to commit?

It is much better if he does it on his own

One of the biggest challenges women facing while dating is to get commitment from a man. Cathy has been dating a man for over six months but their relationship has not gone too far since he never showed any desire to take the relationship to the next level. They enjoyed each others company but never reached a point to make their relationship more official.

Photo of a bride putting the wedding band on her bridegroom She says, "For Valentines Day I thought it would be nice for us to get together and spend some quality time. I even thought that he might make a stronger commitment to me. After showing his reluctance to even go on a date with me, I gave up, but at the last minute he showed up at my place. We had a pleasant evening as we both do like each other. We talked for hours about family, personality, our zodiac signs, etc. He confided he told his friends that he finds me sweet. I asked him Does he think he takes care of my needs, and he said no, and not like he would like to. When he asked me if I was happy he came, I told him, yes, but I think my frustration with his cavalier attitude showed. He also noticed it. Do you think I am wasting my time with this man? Will I ever be able to have a real relationship with this man?"

You know I always get a bad feeling when a woman has to ask a guy to spend time with her - it simply means that the guy is not serious about the relationship. And I think that is where you are right now. It seems he came not because he was looking forward to it and thought it would be romantic to spend time with you - he came because he thought he owed it to you. (Related: Friend with benefits)

From now on, I will suggest that you don't reach out to him and wait for him to proactively pursue you - if he does, then be polite and see where the relationship goes. If he does not contact you frequently enough and comes up with excuses about his time constraints, well, it might have been a casual relationship for him. Don't lose sleep over that. It is time for you to move on too. When you force a man to commit against his will, he might do so, but such relationships often end up in divorce and breakup.

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