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Priscilla
writes, "I have just found out that my
husband had an extramarital affair 3 years ago.
He didn't deny it and said it only happened once.
The woman
he had the affair with claims they have a
child together. He says that he doesn't believe
that the kid is his. She only contacted him after
3 years and the child is now approaching is second
birthday.
He loves me and our 5 kids dearly and my youngest is
just six-months old. I still love him after what
happened. He asked me for forgiveness and begged
me not to
leave him. WHAT MUST I DO? I DO LOVE
HIM!"
Forgiveness is
fundamental to a happy marriage
I am a firm believer in forgiveness
and giving people second chances. Since your husband has
told you the truth and I hope you realize that we are
all human and can commit mistakes (maybe if you look
closely enough you too will realize that you have made
mistakes in life and someone gave you another chance),
it is best for everyone that you forgive him (Hillary
Clinton did) and try to
move on
-- I would not give this advice if he were a
compulsive cheat. The important point is that he
loves you and the kids and to be very honest it is
really not that important that at some point he had
sex with
another woman (maybe the woman trapped him or
seduced him or he was
drunk
or your
marriage was at a difficult point).
You two still need to decide
what to do if the child is his. A simple test can
decide if she is right. Trust me, sometimes all it takes
is just one time
sex and a woman can get pregnant. I am guessing that
this woman is probably right because she must know that
a test will be done. If he is the father, he should
simply act like a
man and fulfill his responsibilities as the father
(and not be a
deadbeat dad like Eddie Murphy or deny fatherhood
like John Edwards). And painful that it will be for you,
it is best to include this child in your extended
family. |
