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Amber
writes, "I had what I thought was an exclusive and
committed relationship with a man 10 years my junior
[I am 37]. I took my time to get to know him and waited
about 2 months before we
became intimate. We had specific goals -- both short
and long term -- and supported each other in working
towards them. but, he never introduced me to any of his
family members, only 3 close friends. This was a thorn
in my side and I let him know that on several occasions
but no change. Then approximately 2 weeks into this year
he became distant, few calls, no texts messages, no
affection, hardly any
intimacy. He cannot or will not tell me what has
happened. One day I was the "love of his life," then the
next, I was just some lady. What happened? I feel
disillusioned and very hurt. Did I misinterpret his
dialogue, behavior, or professed love?"
It
appears to me that this man may have simply had a fetish
for being with a
mature woman; that is why the reluctance to
introduce
you to his family despite his discussion of long
term
goals for the relationship. And once he had a good
idea of what it was all about, he decided to end it.
Maybe he has
met
another woman that will enhance his
fetish
or has found someone that he can bring to his family,
but it is clear that he does not want this relationship
to
continue.
I must mention, though, that this could have nothing to
do with your
being older or his having a fetish. I have seen this
happen even in relationships among people with similar
ages. The man finds someone, is not sure if that is what
he wants, stays in it because of lack of an alternative,
and then finds someone "perfect," and moves on, leaving
the first woman totally confused and
heartbroken.
I am sure that this experience has taught you a few
things so it is best to learn from them and
move
on without making sweeping judgments about men or
younger men
or relationships. |
