Carla writes,
"I got
divorced seven years ago and decided to dedicate my
life to my
twins. It was tough and kept me busy. I
got so absorbed in my family that I forgot the my
personal needs. I think a good friend of mine is
showing
romantic interest in me and I was so ignorant that I
did not even notice for months. What should I do?
I have even forgotten
how to date. What will my kids think? I
want to do something fun but am not sure if I am ready to
have a
serious relationship. Please help."
What you have
gone through is not unusual.
Divorce can be a
big challenge when you have young children and if you
go through a prolonged legal process and/or
custody battles, it can drain you. However, it
seems that you have survived all of that. That means
that you must start to think about YOU. Yes, your
children are growing up and very soon they will be on
their
way to college but you have a
long
life ahead of you. Therefore, it is important
that you pay attention to both your
physical and
emotional needs.
How to get
started with dating if you are a single parent?
-
Make time
for it. Consider it as important as
fitness or
dieting or your
career.
-
Make up your
mind about the
type of relationship that you want.
It is perfectly fine not to want a serious
relationship and you can be upfront about it
with a date so that everyone is clear about
the limits.
-
Children
will understand. You do not have to
disclose each and every
date to your children. You have a
right to a social life and they do not have to
know all the minor details. However, if
you realize that you are ready to introduce
someone to your children, take your time,
and only when you are convinced that s/he will
be around for a while, should you do so.
(Related:
Dating a man with baggage)
-
Finally, use
your
experience with a relationship to make
this one a
better relationship.
Related:
Single mom cannot find
date |
