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Tamara
writes, "I was impressed by your advice to
women on leaving their husbands if they are
losers or if their
marriage is not working out. I am leaving mine after
10 years of marriage. We have two children together. I
feel good about us
getting a divorce but awful about
breaking up an (unhappy)
marriage and family. Any insight? I have
met a man
from
France and he is coming here in two months. Am I
moving too fast?"
Please
read what you wrote: "unhappy
marriage." If for whatever reason you were
not happy
in that marriage, it does not help either you or
your husband to be together any more (and I am assuming
that you and your husband have done the best you could
to
save your marriage). Obviously you are miserable,
but then by not
loving your husband, you are not being fair to him
either as a
wife.
It is, therefore, better for you to
move
on and that way enable your husband to move on as
well. Maybe he too can
find someone that will love him and he will love
her.
Now promise me that you will do your very best to have a
painless breakup. Yes, things did not work out and
maybe he did not treat you right, but for the
sake of
your children, the less bitter it is the better it is
for you. No one can change the fact that he is the
father of the kids and they have a right to love him
and get his love no matter what happened between the two
of you. A family member of mine does not even talk on
the phone with her
ex
and it is very hard on the kids; they can't even
fake to be
parents at the kids' graduation at school or
celebrate
a birthday together.
Now regarding your
French lover (oh
I love France so much), well, it happened, so don't
worry about timing. Go ahead and see what happens with
him --
French men can be very
charming and I would relocate to
France in a heartbeat. |
