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Brenda
writes, "I can never initiate
making love with my partner, luckily he doesn't have
a problem initiating but I'm sure he'd love me too and I
want to but haven't got the courage to. Is this
fear of rejection? I'm confused! I'm a little
minx in bed when I
relax, but then it goes then I get all
self conscious and makes my man feel odd too. I make
all the
moaning noises! But I also turn into a mute and
can't say anything! Am I weird? Please help!"
Behavior in bed is a reflection of
our personalities
No, I
wouldn't call you weird but you are not yet comfortable
with your
femininity. It could be due to
negative image of sex due to
religious
upbringing or other
traumas.
To get started, you have to first convince yourself that
sex with someone you love is beautiful. The main
goal of
sex is to please one another and there is nothing
immoral or dirty about it. Actually, I like to believe
that as long as two partners are willingly engaging in
any activity, there is nothing unacceptable in this
world. I think our
mission in the bedroom should be to maximize our
pleasure. And I also like to say that if your
partner does not agree with this
philosophy, you are
with the wrong person.
Secondly, stop being too
conscious about your body or desires. Even
Hollywood celebs have issues with their bodies and
while you may want to
look
perfect without clothes, do not forget that your man
probably does not care because he might be too
worried about his own body. So just
relax.
Once you have
overcome these mental blocks, then, get on your
mission to
enjoy yourself without guilt and give the same to
your man. Will your partner decline your initiative some
days? Sure! Chances are that it may have nothing to do
with you. Contrary to popular belief,
men too
have days or low libido either due to
stress or
lack of sleep or
emotional state or just hormones. On those days, if
you still feel like it, go ahead and
please just yourself, and can tell your partner that
he does not have to feel bad about it. |
