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Maureen
is
married woman with two kids but in a
horrible marriage to a man who is not only
abusive
but has literally made a slave out of her. She writes,
"He forced me to drop out of college when I
got pregnant so that I never graduated. Now he
refuses to pay for my tuition. Since he is the only one
who works, I have to depend on him for everything. He
not only
pays all the bills, he also insists that he goes
with me
grocery shopping, so that I basically have no money
with me at any time. Since our kids are both younger
than 5, I still cannot work. Unfortunately, I don't have
any family or friends in the area who could take us in;
I've already asked. I'm not talented in
handicrafts or do anything to
make money from home -- I am essentially thinking of
working in retail. I guess maybe you can see why I'm so
frustrated and confused on how to get out of here. I'm
beginning to feel hopeless. How does someone in my
situation leave without ending up on the streets?"
Abused women should not lose hope
I am actually shocked that in the
United States, there are women that are essentially
prisoners in their own homes with no freedom. I find it
hard to believe that people like you and your husband
even exist in 21st century America.
Having said that, I am not hopeless like you because I
talk to
women who fight all kinds of challenges to
go
ahead in life. And I am amazed by women who do
things that they would have never thought they would or
may even find disgusting otherwise, but treat that only
as a part time arrangement to
get what they want. Like the girl who was paying for
college but worked as an
exotic
dancer. Or a woman who worked on some website
chatting with men for money so that she could send
her son to a private school in her town.
I am not sure if you have a situation that he is
physically
abusing you; otherwise, you might be able to find
shelter in one of those women's homes, which are not
great but better than being assaulted each day. That is
why you should hang in there because as you rightly
know, you will end up on the streets.
I do not want you to give up. Take the time over the
next few days to really think who can help you (you
never know who of your old friends might come and help
you even though you have not spoken to them for years --
I know it is embarrassing to ask but human beings are
very kind and are often willing to help) or what you can
do to
make some money to feel a little bit more
independent. Check out the Craig's List in your area to
see what you could do to
make some money. I guess at this point you really
have few choices so you should be open to almost
anything. |
