| Maria
writes, "I am 33 and my boyfriend is 23; we
live together now but
I get insecure and think that he will
leave me
later for someone younger. It's hard for me because
I am constantly thinking that I am
too old. All his friends call me a
cougar and I don't like it. Can we really work? I am
also afraid that
he won't ever fully commit but he tells me that
every one he has ever been with has
left him for someone else."
Relationships end all the time regardless of age
To
some extent you have answered your own question. See,
your boyfriend says that even as a 23 year old he has
experienced that
women simply leave him for someone else. Even if you
would date a 33 year old or older man what is the
guarantee that he will not
leave you for someone younger, or even worse as is
happening these days, for an
older woman, or even another man.
There
is absolutely no evidence that suggests that
men dating older women are more likely to leave them
for
younger women. People leave all the time and we
cannot let our lives be defined by this
fear.
Cougar is not a dirty word
Regarding
being called a
cougar, well, what is wrong with that? Let me say
this: people will talk all the time and they will always
find something to talk about. If they wouldn't talk
about your age or the fact that your
boyfriend is much younger than you, they might make
fun of your body or the way you speak or walk or dress
or whatever. The more attention you pay to what others
say the more miserable your life is going to become.
Accept your age and other facts
that you cannot change
With
respect your feeling that
you are old, well, if your boyfriend has no problem
with you and
chose a relationship with you rather than girls his
age, it is because he likes you the way you are.
He is also not a 4-year old not to realize that you will
get old and so will he over time.
Maria,
just relax and accept things the way they are. You both
like each other and are
enjoying your relationship together at this time.
Just enjoy the moment. This time is precious and work on
your relationship so that you can have a beautiful time
NOW.
Do not stop living now because we all know that some day
we are going to die. |
