Libido in women after 40

How to raise desire to keep up with my husband?

Summary: Women suffer from many insecurities as they get older and get more concerned about how they look, particularly without clothes. This sort of insecurities get amplified while dating or being married to much younger men. The reality is that it is naive to think that men do not understand aging or that they only look at a woman's body and ignore her as a person.

Jessica writes, "I am one of those cougars married to younger men. I am 13 years older than my husband, and now I am learning the hard way the challenges of a marriage between couples with huge age difference. I feel terrible because I have lost all interest in sex and I am worried that my hubby will either cheat on me or divorce me for a younger girl. I do recognize that I have many insecurities about how I look and am trying to deal with them but so far nothing has worked. What should I do?"

Both men and women lose interest in sex as we age, and due to other factors, like poor health and sex becoming stale. In any case, reduction in libido can happen at any age. In other words, there is no reason to panic. I also expect that this man who married you knowing fully well that women age earlier than men and go through menopause, will be very supportive as a loving husband and try to work through this rather than abandon you as you fear.

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Regardless of your age, you need to figure out why is it that you have lower libido. An appointment with your doctor is always a great idea to make sure that you are in good physical health because that can lower sexual desire. The other question to ask is about your mental state. If you are depressed, stressed, worried or have any other emotional issues, you will not want to make love.

And finally, could it be that sex has simply becoming boring and routine for you two? In that case, it is time to spice things up.

What you are going through is normal and happens to everyone. And couples of all ages deal with differences in libido. In other words, you can work through these issues relatively easily and have a wonderful marriage in which your husband is sexually satisfied and you do not need to stress out because of not being able to make love to him as often or as passionately as you did in the past.

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