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Carrie
writes, "I'm not interested at all in doing the
internet dating websites anymore due to a series of
frustrating experiences. I am looking at social groups
that I can join in my area so that I may meet people who
share the same interest that I have. I'm not interested
in joining
singles groups but rather groups with hobbies and
interests, so perhaps, I may happen upon someone in that
vein. I didn't expect to be
single at
40. By now I had hoped to be
married with two kids, but I'm pretty
happy with my life as it is. It would just be nice
to
share it with someone who is ready, willing and
able
to love and who is
emotionally mature. Of course we'd have to be
mutually
attracted to each other. Even though this doesn't
seem like I'm asking for a lot, it seems so impossible
for this to happen. I'm in the
NYC area
and in this big place it is
hard to find love."
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I do agree that
meeting people through shared interests is a
good alternative. That way you are surrounded by
people who share at least one common interest.
MeetUp is one good option to do that. They have
many options to choose from, all the way from
painting to
music to
software design. |
I would also suggest that keep your
social profile up. So don't miss opportunities to go to
parties and other activities that you maybe invited
to. I know a lot of time
single people are reluctant to go to events where it
will be mostly
couples
and
families, but what I have been told, is that you may
not
meet single men there but might meet others who may
introduce you to someone. I mean, if someone makes a
good impression on me, I am happy to introduce her to my
single
male friends.
Yes, it is ironical that someone may have difficulty
meeting people in
NYC,
but once you want someone specific, it is not always
easy. The other challenge for you, and I am being honest
here, is your
age. At this point, most
men are married, and the ones that are single are
either
divorced or have had a few
bad
relationships that did not lead to a
happy
marriage. Wonderful that these men maybe, they are
also more likely to be somewhat cynical and skeptical.
That just makes it harder for them and the women they
date to move forward easily.
I admire that you do not beat yourself for
being
single and have a very
positive outlook on life. That is very important
because no one wants to date an angry, cynical,
pessimistic person. |
