Pick-up Lines

By Mike Pilinski

Judging from my mail lately, it seems that using a pick up line to meet women has become the most highly sought after Holy Grail in the entire Seduction Universe. You know what I'm talking about... that "underground" of guys who are on a quest to figure out a way to forcefully re-focus the romantic attention of women on themselves wherever, and whenever, they choose to... all with the use of a single most wondrous, fantastically glib pick up line? Maybe you were considering the application of a few gems like these yourself.

I float this challenge confident that it will never be met because I don't think anyone has perfected such a standardized and easily canned approach to meeting women. Simply because it's NOT possible. How can you possibly come up with some perfect... something to say to a woman that would take into account every imaginable variable that exists between men and women? One that would account for differences in personality, pre-conceived notions of proper social behavior, current life phase and relationship situation, hormonal balance, religious beliefs, level of emotional pre-occupation, physical self-view, social conditioning, and current mood? Not to mention just how her unconscious mind might respond merely to seeing your face! Do you remind her subconsciously of that guy in grammar school she always had a huge crush on or even dreamed of marrying? Or are you a pattern match for Mr. Right? Mr. Right Now?  Or Mr. Serial-abusing Step-dad?

Understand that your ability to "pick up" women has very little to do with any magical opening words that you can utter (other that a simple hello and a subdued smile), and EVERYTHING to do with your magical opening attitude.

Women are highly emotional creatures (Emotional intimacy) -- far more so than men (except for those of you so desperate to get laid that you emit the repellant stench of desperation). They want to witness your potential to create emotion in them. Women are not impressed with a man's words so much as they are with his male display. Male display? By that I mean the certain mixture of qualities and characteristics which broadcast a signal to women that a man has achieved a degree of respect (and perhaps even dominance) OVER HIS FELLOW MEN. This "air" is held fast in the way a guy carries himself. More than anything else, this unspoken aura can set a woman's heart aflame EVEN AGAINST HER WISHES.  It does so because it taps into an ancient instinct buried far within the recesses of her subconscious psyche -- one that tells her when it's time to mate. (Related:  How to bond with a man?)

You see, humans are sent "into heat" by the cues they get from their higher intellect -- NOT by simple chemical signals like most lesser animals. When humans -- men and women -- sense certain audio-visual-olfactory signals coming from a nearby member of the opposite sex that match a specific pattern suggesting a high probability of reproductive success (i.e. youth in women, strength in men), their "old" hindbrains are automatically conditioned to prepare for the possibility of mating. It must be so -- humans would not have survived for this long otherwise. Reproduction, along with survival, is the Prime Directive of every life form.

That doesn't mean these urges can't be suppressed by our thinking minds however, and most often they are. We don't go around recklessly humping one another like maniacs at the merest suggestion of an opportunity. We are civilized. Controlled.

Well -- perhaps we're controlled only in the sense that our actions are limited by our own highly developed (and uniquely human) sense of shame. Shame is a vivid emotional force within all of us that sets a boundary defining the limits of what we can accomplish. The weight of the shame we carry can be sensed almost immediately as the underlying driving force that lurks behind all of our actions, almost like an off-stage puppet master. It's shape is formed from the sum of all our life experiences, and especially by how we've responded to them by creating self defeating behaviors (or not).

When it comes to our ability to meet women, male shame can really get in the way. Shame about our weakened position among the hierarchy of other males surrounding us. Shame creates fear, and fear is the marker of the low status male -- the man who has been beaten and put in his place by other men. When she senses your fear, it makes her uncomfortable and she wants to draw away from you immediately. If you reach out and touch her timidly... fearfully, it will make your touch seem unpleasant and even creepy.  The High Status Male, on the other hand, acts with a confidence that seems (but isn't necessarily) devoid of fear. Even if you can fake the illusion of the HSM, you can make yourself seem enticing instead of disturbing. It is worth all your effort. 

Meet Women 

In a kind of role reversal to using a pick up line to meet women, women were asked just what would constitute a classy pick up action by a man. One quote stood out from all the others... "A man who seems like he's lived a little will always capture my interest..." There it is guys, right in a nutshell... women want a man who seems like he's LIVED. When you've accumulated a resume of real experiences in your life -- career, social, emotional, romantic and physical -- it shows through in a way that, not only is somehow sensed by every woman that matters, but done so in mere moments of first encountering you. It's in your attitude, the way you conduct yourself, the cut of your clothes or how casually you wear them... the gleam in your eye. All these factors act together to "throw off" the best pick up line there can possibly be: the NON-VERBAL one.

Yes that's right, non-verbal. The way to reduce your fear of rejection is to remove from your mind the enormous pressure to perform in the face of uncertainty. You do this by perfecting your Male Display to signal women around you that you are a man with a life's purpose -- that you are centered and able to deliver on the kind of emotions that all women desire from their romantic involvements... in a word, you are a man who's lived a little! And it shows. Now let the women begin to signal back their interest in you, and you'll find yourself able to take action with an ease that is astonishing.

The idea that you are going to walk up to some great looking woman, reeking of low male status, and stammer out some magical "pick up line" (that you read in a book somewhere) that will somehow force her to overlook the fountain of deadly negative vibes you are otherwise broadcasting is flat out ridiculous. Understand that there is no such magic. Women are not stupid (not the ones we're most interested in, anyway) -- they can see who you are. You cannot compensate for a lifetime of letting your Male Display atrophy away (or for never having developed one in the first place) with some string of impossibly clever words.

There is only one way that using a pick up line to meet women can have any real chance for you, and that's when it's delivered from a platform of glimmering male life force. This power doesn't come naturally to every man -- but it is a developed skill like any other that can be learned merely by observing how it's accomplished by the best among us. And mimicking their ways.

About the author

Mike Pilinski is the author of "Without Embarrassment: The Social Coward's Totally Fearless Seduction System"... a unique method of meeting girls that will have you making up for wasted time spent living in shy-guy hell from the very first moment you test it out.