Our Tokyo team contacted several Japanese women who either have non-Japanese spouses or boyfriends and the unanimous opinion was that when it comes to selecting their special ones, Japanese women apply the same standards for non-Japanese men as they do for Japanese men. That essentially means that depending on individual preferences, some of the attributes considered are personality, looks, sense of humor, style, and Japanese language abilities. This is not to say that a small number of Japanese women do not seek non-Japanese lovers either for adventure, as matter of curiosity, as a toy to play with, to simply show off for a while, or for English conversation practice.

We have been told many times that a large number of Japanese women are fascinated with Caucasians but it does not mean that they will sacrifice other qualities mentioned above.  Thus, while looks are always important whether in Japan or elsewhere, it is important to focus on what else women look for in men, Japanese or otherwise.  As Ryan points out, "I think that in all countries of the world this problem exists, but in Japan it is harder. If you have a lot of knowledge of Japanese culture and historical evolution of  Japanese traditions and if you really make an effort to understand Japanese society and women, you can find true love in Japan.  This approach can eliminate almost all problems that the Japanese society causes to a Gaijin.  A Gaijin that does not know Japan, should never think of a Japanese lover!"  (Related:  Making love to a Japanese man)

Here is some advice to find love and friends in Japan:

• Most Japanese women are very picky.  There is a misconception that some Japanese women are easy (like anywhere else in the world) but you should not base your search on this assumption.  Just count yourself as lucky when you get such a woman.

• Japanese women are stylish and they expect the same when they evaluate a man.  Thus, dirty jeans and sneakers are not going to be appreciated.  It is better to be over-dressed in Japan even if this is not your style.  You can go for a casual look at certain occasions but not by sacrificing style.  (Related:  Dating Japanese women during Japan trip)

• Japanese women like to be treated at least as well as women elsewhere in the developed world.  Do not treat them like objects - you will have no luck.

• Improve your Japanese language abilities.  The number of women that you will be approach multiplies tremendously.

• If you think you are not physically fit, rather than complaining about the women, it may be a good opportunity to start looking at improving your fitness.

• Japanese women do not need foreign boyfriends (Latino men, Japanese women) since it is a major problem in Japan to date non-Japanese.  There are a lot of cute Japanese men around, like Masi Oka, and non-Japanese men have to provide sufficient incentive for Japanese women to consider them.

Recommended links:  Dating techniques for Japanese and other Asians     Date with a Japanese man  Obsession with Japanese men

Relationship problems with a Japanese woman    Dating Asian women    Romantic relationships in Japan